Conversation...is it still an art?

I just got one of those envelopes in the mail that contains a bunch of ads and coupons for restaurants, gutter and roofing companies, carpet cleaners and mechanics etc. I usually flip through the stack quickly because you never know when there might be one in there that is for a company I actually use or intend to contact.

As I was flipping through the stack today there were mostly the same old ads that I have no interest in but then one caught my eye. It had the words “Create a conversation starter” on the front. It was an ad for customized smart phone cases. My immediate thought was “This is the way to start a conversation with someone???!!! Maybe I am really old fashioned but how about putting the phone down and then you would be able to start a conversation with the person the old-fashioned way. Maybe you could start by making eye contact with the person?  Maybe paying them a compliment, or say something about your surroundings or circumstances; or comment on the weather for that matter?

I understand that technology is necessary and that it is evolving and that it is useful and all of that; but does it have to replace human interaction completely? There is a video out there that illustrates this and it just makes me sad. It is called “I forgot my phone”. I would be the one who had forgotten her phone… When I was waiting tables I saw this at almost every single table, the people eating together were merely there eating at the same table. They were so preoccupied by their phones that quite frankly I am surprised they even noticed what kind of food I put down in front of them. There were people at business lunches and they were all checking e-mails and working while eating. There were couples on dates and both of them were more interested in their phone than the person they were with. There were entire families where every single person was sitting there staring at their own little screen. Why even be together then??

Don’t get me wrong, I am no saint when it comes to this either. I do not have a smart phone but I do get distracted by my computer or tablet. There is “just one more thing I want to check or read or ….” I do not like it, so I am trying my best to break the habit and at least be mostly tech-free when my kids are awake. It is hard and it is going to take some getting used to, but I think it will be worth it in the end!

Here is to talking to and connecting with people face-to-face; let’s not forget the art of conversation!